Random PickUp Lines
by GryffindorGals
Summary: A series of one-shots containing random pick-up lines Sirius will be experimenting with.
1. The Stereo

**A/N: **

**We are in the process of making a series of really random cheesy one-shots that contain corny pick-up lines that Sirius will be experimenting with.**

**Please read and review!**

**Disclaimer: "Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!" - Homer J Simpson.**

**Long story short, we don't own either Harry Potter or the Simpsons.**

The Stereo

"Hey Emily, wanna go see my stereo?" Sirius said leaning casually against a wall, letting his book bag slide off his shoulder.

"Your what?" Emily asked him.

"I don't know... Some bloke said it to a girl on a muggle movie. Then they went up to his room and had sex. I thought we might give it a go." Sirius said, flashing a smile and winking.

Emily rolled her eyes. "You're a real prat, you know that?" Emily said walking away.

"I know I'm not a grocery item, but I can tell when you're checking me out." Sirius shouted after her.


	2. Hogsmade

**A/N:**

**R&R! The next chapter will be up ASAP. The more reviews, the sooner it will be up! Any feedback is welcome : )**

**Disclaimer: "The sky had a baby from my cereal box!" - Spongebob Squarepants**

**-Rettop Yrrah nwo ton od eW-**

**Hogsmade**

As the first vist to Hogsmade drew nearer, Sirius became more and more desperate for finding a date. He would shout out to random girls in the hallway, asking them to go with him.

"Hey, you! I must have had some Felix Felicis, because I think I'm about to get lucky, want to come to Hogsmade with me?"

The girl just kept on walking, completely ignoring Sirius. This did not dampin his efforts in the slightest. Infact, he asked the next girl he passed.

"Interested in making some magic together? My wand is at the ready."

This girl had enough sense to stop walking and slap him across the face before continueing on her way.

James snickered. "Tough break, Padfoot. Why don't you just ask someone out the normal way rather than using those interesting pick up lines?"

Sirius was flabbergasted. "These _interesting_ pick up lines are working just fine thank you!" he retorted, stalking away to find his next victim.

**A/N:**

**By the way, our disclaimer is 'We do not own Harry Potter' spelled backwards : )**

**Thanks for reading, please review!**


	3. Rasins

Raisins

GryffindorGals

"Do you have any raisins?" Sirius asked a girl at random who was coming out from the Great Hall one Tuesday afternoon.

"Uh, yeah, I do actually," she said reaching for her pocket, "Did you want some?"

Sirius cursed under his breath. "Oh, no I'm horribly allergic."

Walking away, she shot him repeated confused looks as she looked back at him over her shoulder.

"Do you honestly think this is going to work Sirius?" Remus asked his friend.

"Of course it's going to work! It _has_ to work!" Sirius exclaimed. "All the muggle blokes use them, they're called pick-up lines. That's why all the hot muggle girls are taken!"

Another girl exited the Great Hall and Sirius tried his trick again.

"Do you have any raisins?" he asked her grinning.

"No," she said raising an eyebrow.

"How about a snogging partner for the next half hour?"

"No thanks," she said walking away.

"Okay, well it didn't work on her, but she must have been seriously mental. It'll work on the next one, I know it will."

Remus smirked. "Good luck with that."

A/N: Reviews=Updates :)


	4. Divination

**Divination Class**

**GryffindorGals**

**Disclaimer:**

**The evil disclaimer stealer robbed us and took all of our oh-so-brilliant disclaimer ideas. Anyway, hopefully superman will catch him and bring our ideas back to us. But, we can only hope…. So here's our disclaimer.**

**We do not own Harry Potter.**

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Sirius Black stood up from his poof in Divination class where he was sitting with James and walked over to a girl at the next table. As he approached, she turned from her friend and looked at him.

"I'd like to tell your future, could I see your hand?" he said grinning at her suggestively.

"Err, sure," she said, dropping her quill and giving him her hand.

Sirius then took his own quill from his pocket and proceeded to scribble something down.

"Your future is clear to me," he said winking and walking back to a laughing James.

The girl looked down to see Sirius's untidy scrawl spelling 'Sirius Black' across her palm.

"Blokes," her friend said rolling her eyes.


	5. Noticing

**Pick Up Line: Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.**

**Disclaimer:**

**Sorry to disappoint you, but we don't own Harry Potter.**

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"Hey, you!"

"Me?"

"Yeah, you! Wait up!" Sirius Black shouted as he ran up to the girl of his questioning.

"What?" the girl asked, sounding a bit annoyed.

"Sorry, I just noticed you noticing me, that I noticed, and you noticed that I noticed- Eh, anyway, will you go out with me?" he finished lamely.

The girl examined him for a moment before huffing the word "no" and walking away.

"At least that one considered you for a moment," James said supportively.

Sirius stuck a pose. "Yes, I do look quite attractive today. It's this new cologne- take a whiff!" he said as he stuck his armpit in James's face.

"Uh, Sirius? Where did you get that stuff?" James asked.

"I found it on your nightstand," he said innocently.

"Er, that wasn't cologne, it was perfume for Lily."

"You mean I've been repelling girls all day because I smell womanly?" he asked.

James simply shrugged.

Rummaging through his pocket, he drew out a pad of paper and checked something off what appeared to be a list.

James got a glimpse of the list before it disappeared back in Sirius's pocket. It read:

Things That Turn Women On

Perfume was crossed off the list.


End file.
